but you're the apple of my eye anyway (newbie1990) wrote,
but you're the apple of my eye anyway
newbie1990

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Continued from here.


This is Kahlan and Cara from Legend of the Seeker. THEY ARE BASICALLY GIRLFRIENDS. They travel across the world with Kahlan's boyfriend Richard and some old dude who likes to make portentious statements for the lulz. His name is Zedd, one of a number of deeply ridiculous names courtesy of Terry Goodkind, badficcer extraordinaire.


The picture is a publicity shot of them in their costumes, Kahlan's pure white robes of innocence and Cara's leather dominatrix gear. That second part is not an exaggeration, she is part of a group of women who serve Darken Rahl by attacking his enemies with magic dildos of pain. There is one episode is season 8 that is basically BDSM porn. NOT EVEN KIDDING.

Kahlan is a Confessor, meaning she can make people into her slaves without the aid of magic dildos (did I mention? The magic dildos turn you into a slave. Isn't it great?). Indeed, she does it with her bare hands! ...I honestly didn't intend for that to sound so euphemism-y. Her eyes go all black, then theirs do, and they do whatever she says. Unfortunately, she loses control of this power during sex, meaning she and Richard may never consummate their passion, and instead must spend their days gazing longingly at one another and kissing in between beating up armies of bad guys who they somehow always manage to defeat in stylish slow-mo.

At the start of season 2, Kahlan and Cara are bitter enemies. They exchange sharp words that crackle with sexual tension, but as the series wears on they develop a charming friendship (which also cannot be consummated, as Kahlan's Confessor powers could kill Cara). I don't remember episode one too well, but their scenes together are basically awesome. Kahlan gets to be all badass at Cara while Cara is uncaring back. It is like: awesome women! Teaming up while being angry at each other! That first episode was very good.

But not as good as later episodes, where they hold hands, save each other's lives an improbable number of times, and smile adoringly at each other. Well, that last one's mostly Kahlan. They become friends, in spite of the vast differences between them, because of the bond of killing people together and both being fierce as hell (I don't care that no-one's used that word since 2005, IT IS MY FAVOURITE). I love them for not being rivals and for Cara having all the best lines and because female friendship is not nearly common enough in any genre, never mind the fantasy one.


I am pretty much the only person in the world that 'ships this, but 'ship it I do. I want Jeff to come baaack. I 'shipped them from the moment the Doctor was all judgey about Jeff's porn collection (indeed, I decided 'get a girlfriend' meant 'go out with me'). Then The Doctor was all up in his grill, and I am a sucker for not knowing what personal space means (he did it with Rory, too, but I didn't notice it as much at the start because he was all angry rather than encouraging). I mean, he calls him 'the handsome one', how has no-one else picked up on this? Most of all I love that he calls him 'magnificent', which he doesn't even call Amy until later on. He sees his ~potential~ and I kind of feel absurd 'shipping something so obscure so hard, but I dooo. It's there! On the screen!

THERE IS FIC. THE BEST FIC.

The next three, er, at some point.
Tags: doctor who, fic recs, legend of the seeker, ridiculously rare pairings
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